Getting the Most out of Group Therapy
You can benefit from group therapy even when you are not talking much as long as you are fully present. You may find that you have things in common with others; discover that certain issues strike a chord within yourself; begin to see things from a new perspective; or learn a new coping mechanism. Getting the MOST out of group, however, requires taking a risk: opening up and sharing what is truly in your heart. Some tips on how to do that:
Focus on the here-and-now.
It’s easy to tell stories, but this can block true intimacy and emotional connections. It’s more therapeutic to focus on what’s happening in the group (or in your head) in the moment. What is going on that makes you feel closer or more distant towards others? What is happening between the group members? What are you noticing about people’s body language? Though it may be awkward, try to share these observations with the group; it provides important feedback.
Get involved and try to be as open as possible.
You are not expected to offer brilliant solutions and comments. Just honestly share what you are thinking and feeling—even if it’s not pretty—and you will be doing your part. Expressing your emotions will have a far greater impact than sharing information. Remember that you are always in control of how much you wish to disclose about yourself.
Learn to give feedback to others.
Giving feedback in a group is different than socializing in the real world. Here are some tips on how to do it:
- Be specific about what you’re responding to (a particular remark, gesture)
- Be timely, direct, and honest, and provide concrete examples if possible
- Share both positive and negative feedback
Learn to receive feedback from others.
Think of feedback as a gift from other group members. Some tips for receiving feedback:
- Acknowledge feedback when given
- Check in with other group members to see if they feel the same
- If you feel yourself becoming defensive, share it with the group
- Ask for feedback. Find out from others in the group how they perceive you. What role do they see you taking on in the group? What are your “blind spots?”
Avoid giving advice.
Sometimes we really want to offer advice to someone who is struggling, but often when we do we fail to let that person feel heard. Make sure you have heard and fully understood the other person’s feelings before offering advice.
